Whisps of fog

i'm just trying tokeep ahod of this

2008-01-01T06:39:29Z

so i had a hell of along dream last night, it literally lasted for weeks. full days all of it, and i feel a bit older for it, remember.

I may have been only three but i was swinging

2007-10-05T04:30:03Z

I'm still not dead. i shoudl probably be sleeping right now, but thats how it goes. work then straight to a show tommorow, so i should probably wake up extra early and shave and whatnot. might go cleanshaven, might not. saturday is my 5 year reunion, which i doubt i can make as i think i'm doing more sound, but still. 5 year reunion? it's been like 2 tops. I'm sure of it. stupid class officers can't count.

lostrosd @ 2007-09-01T01:40:00

2007-09-01T06:14:24Z

so it's like 2 am, which i suppose is the appropriate time to update, from what i recall that was about when i used to. that special time at night where suddenly, you realize that you do have something to say, and are desperate for someone, anyone to tell it to. today i went to work, got home, lifted a bit, then headed down to saxton to wander around before the football game. the bank ended up closing earlier than i thought it would, so i was wandering around all night with over 700 in my pocket. which does make you a little paranoid. the game was pretty good, we won 25-14, but we could have easily had 2 or 3 more touchdowns. i got to wander around, hang out, get the downlow on the latest trades that the penguins have done( all the way to the cup, i'm sure) and find out that there is an exchange student from thailand. I have made him promise to make me ghaeng khe wan satain in exchange for his life. then i got home, and proceeded to precede with life. fun times. that's where i'm at now. I could update more, but probably will not in favor of listening to some old songs, and trying to decide on a new one ot start learning now that i've pretty much got the wizard mastered. which is kinda hard to do, because there aren't many songs for the harmonica which are not either blues traveler(john popper is a maniac, i'm not that good yet) or older blues. which i like, but there are no tabs or anything for those guys, they just played what they felt, and it varied widely from performance to performance. ah well, i'll come up with something.

Not dead yet

2007-08-29T03:04:18Z

and since only the good die young, I imagine I'll be around for a good long time. I'm a saxtonite for the forseeable future, i've been surveying for going on a year now, and don't expect to stop anytime soon. I also run sound for echo chamber( http://www.echochambers.com ), and I'm hoping ot launch my own business in late spring. I can now play the harmonica, although I've still got some ways to go on it, like you do with any instrument, I at least think i can say i play it now. I've been trying to get in better shape now for a good time, and it's definitely starting to give results. I still haven't been doing cardio, and thats what i should be doing, but i have gotten fairly significantly stronger. I'm no longer really at the point in my life where I'm chasing down women or doing as much crazy partyage as i used to, although i still like to have a good time. between work, working out, and the band i keep myself pretty busy. i guess that's about it for a decent status update. I'll try to make a more blogtacular post later.

lostrosd @ 2006-05-15T22:49:00

2006-05-16T02:53:58Z

where do you go
wit your broken heart in tow
what do you do
with the leftover you

and how do you know
when to let go
where does the good go?
where does the good go?

look me in the eye and tell me
you don't find me attractive
look me in the heart and tell me
that you won't go
look me in the eye and promise
no love is like our love
look me in the heart and unbreak broken
it won't happen

It's love that leaves
that breaks the seal
of always thinking you would be real
happy and healthy
strong and calm
Where does the good go?
Where does the good go?

Where do you go when you're in love
and the world knows?
How do you live so happily
while I am sad and broken down?
What do you say
it's up for grabs
now that you're on your way down?
Where does the good go?
Where does the good go?

lostrosd @ 2006-05-12T03:26:00

2006-05-12T07:27:15Z

fuck vagina's.

literally

lostrosd @ 2006-04-27T02:59:00

2006-04-27T06:59:47Z

what would finn mac cumhail do?

lostrosd @ 2006-04-08T03:34:00

2006-04-08T07:34:43Z

Yes I can bitch until my eyes turn blue
And you're in bed with someone new
And I guess you deserve him
Wish I could waste my time without wasting all your time
You say I'm fixable
A classic case, lack of will
I say I don't wanna try
I'd rather sit here all night

lostrosd @ 2006-03-18T01:06:00

2006-03-18T06:06:36Z

laguer head knows but one desire. laguer head sets his skull on fire.

happy st patties day. i've been drinking for 7 hours, and it still can't fix me. maybe a few more. i don't want to feel like this on this day. it's my holiday. my famiy once saved st patricks life. but still, it hurts.

lostrosd @ 2006-03-16T01:35:00

2006-03-16T06:36:29Z

*deep breath in*
All things in life end in grief and pain. Friends die or leave, loves die or leave. in the end, you yourself will leave and there will be grief and pain in your passing, but the moment can be beautiful.

*deep breath out*

it saw me through last time...

I'm waiting for the moment.

lostrosd @ 2006-02-18T16:50:00

2006-02-18T21:51:38Z

what could i say to you except that i love you, and i'd give me life for yours

lostrosd @ 2006-01-13T05:57:00

2006-01-13T10:59:29Z

somethign about being conscious at 6 makes me want to interconnect with somebody, anybody. not out of depression or anything like that, it's just that there's noone on at all, and you've already did pretty much anything you meant to do, so your just still awake, listening to music, when you suddenly discover something, like a great song you forgot about for years, and how do you share that with someone? how do you preserve that moment for the morning. i think it's this feeling that keeps livejournal going on.

lostrosd @ 2006-01-08T02:44:00

2006-01-08T07:45:21Z

restlessness, things unspoken.

lostrosd @ 2005-09-18T22:02:00

2005-09-19T02:02:13Z

in half remembered dreams i sleep

lostrosd @ 2005-08-06T13:40:00

2005-08-06T17:41:55Z

jello shot night is tonite. 124 s. penn street. bellefonte, pa.

be there beaches. We are talking massive

little mice, little mice

2005-08-03T08:47:04Z

I'm neither dead nor single. I am in fact head over heels for this girl. i had planned on making this quite a larger entry, but the truth is that as soon as i start to compose an entry, i have more to do. There aren't enough hours in the day anymore. I need to mak emy living, spend as much time as possible with the misty-cat, hang with my friends, and chill out, reading and doing the internet thing. c'est la vie

lostrosd @ 2005-06-30T02:47:00

2005-06-30T06:48:07Z

easily the highpoint of the evening

lostrosd @ 2005-06-30T02:46:00

2005-06-30T06:46:42Z

I'm going to go pee of the front porch, drinking a beer

lostrosd @ 2005-06-25T15:54:00

2005-06-25T19:54:41Z

they aren't desperate for love and affection, no they're desperate for you.

quiz stealing no jutsu

2005-06-24T07:10:24Z

You scored as Iceman. Iceman is a very powerful but volitile X-man. His ego and reluctance to follow orders means that he often clashes with Cyclops. Despite being immature sometimes, he's very popular with the ladies and is an extremely powerful X-Man. Powers: Can lower the temperature in areas around him. Basically, he has a near limitless ability to freeze things and make massive amounts of ice.

</td>

Iceman

90%

Colossus

85%

Gambit

80%

Nightcrawler

75%

Wolverine

75%

Jean Grey

75%

Cyclops

55%

Beast

55%

Storm

55%

Rogue

55%

Emma Frost

50%

Most Comprehensive X-Men Personality Quiz
created with QuizFarm.com

lostrosd @ 2005-06-20T17:21:00

2005-06-20T21:22:05Z

the emo game rules

lostrosd @ 2005-06-20T14:34:00

2005-06-20T18:38:38Z

opened it up, sure enough, there we where arm in arm again. I imagine I'll go spend about ten bucks ona fifth and spend this anniversary the way i always do. excitement. Not really worth posting, but i'm killing time until work starts.

feelin matt-tacular once more

2005-06-18T12:50:02Z

there where a few more musings i was going to put up, but to be honest, I'm feeling quite a bit better about it all. There's something about the mountains that just put my feet back underneath me. I am once more quite happy to rock out, with my cock out. and no second thoughts.

lostrosd @ 2005-06-17T11:40:00

2005-06-17T18:57:29Z

So, Here I am once more that i might be able to further explain my thoughts. I think I've figured out what that weight may be, i think it might be stagnation, baker is always going off about how he is trying to grow as a person, and it made me realize toda that i haven't really grown at all since about january, two years ago. Watching baker these past few days, as he came out of his shell much as i did at that time, drove that home. And i've started to lose my enthusiasm for that lifestyle, but it's still who i am to a large extent. I've done a lot of things, and gained a lot of experiance, but there's been no real growth there. I found a path, a way of life that satisfied all but one of my desires, and i kept at it and followed it. I have the same goals, and the same desires. and I'm more or less interchangable, besides a few more pounds and a few more scars. But I don't think that the answer is a radical shift in lifestyle, to just careen from one experiance to another, bouncing back and forth when I may just need to reflect on a few things about myself. Or maybe it's just that I'm feeling old. Down here, they all have the eyes of children. 3 years may not seem like much, and 21 might not seem old, but it sure feels it. They're all so unaware, unsure, unknowing. there's a real gap in terms of life experiance there, and I'm definitly aware of it. Or maybe it's just knowing that I'm in the final few years of my life, That I don't have that much time left. Maybe today is the day I disappear, leave my phone and wallet behind in the sands and just wander, looking for them. but it will be a long time before they come to the sands, i think i need to start elsewhere. I don't think I'm quite ready for that as of yet. I have a lot left to do. Still, the time isn't too far, I feel the pull some days more than others, but it's been getting stronger the past few years.

I also need to start fulfilling my duties as a shaman once again, I've started to lose track of the path in the last few months, and i need to start up again. This is just the duties i've fallen off with though, not the beliefs. I need to go gather a few materials, and take them home, do a bit of work, and then while i'm there, I'll probably spend some time tanning. I have more than a few phone calls i should probably make, but i doubt i will. I think I'm going to quit smoking for a few months while i'm at it.

paying some of my few remaining funds to update from the beach.

2005-06-15T22:58:05Z

The beach is really rocking, but expensive as hell. I have no more money, really, I don't think I'm eating the next few days. Sand holds dominion of both rest and forgeting, But I can't rest, and I don't want to forget. Still, life is good. I think I might be slowing down though, I don't know if it's age, or if harold was right in that life moves in cycles, or if I've jsut started to get tired of the life i live. I don't know. Who I am, and the things I do make me really happy, But I'm starting to feel like I'm dragging a weight behind me as i do everything anymore. I still love it, but it's just a little harder. I'm pretty much out of time, and i don'thave cash for more, so I'll see all you cat's later.